stillsostrange

Yesterday my partner and ran Warrior Dash for our second year (my third). This year it fell after days of heavy rain. The parking lot was a muddy deathtrap--we watched cars being pushed and towed out on our way in, and helped push a car on our way out. The entire 3.5+ mile course was one giant mud obstacle. Muddy trails, muddy climbing frames, muddy climbing ropes... Good times, good times. The most serious obstacle for me was the water feature, which we've never had here before. The swimming and hauling myself up parts were fine, but the water was so cold my lungs seized going in and after treading water waiting for others to clear the path, the strength started bleeding out of me. I wasn't warm again for hours.

Afterward we decided not to go see the Church play, and instead went to see Spring. Sadly, this turned out to be a poor decision. The story is a bilious sack of human-centric crap, about the transformative experience of falling in love with a bland, selfish "nice guy." Fuck everything about it. Or simply stop watching it five minutes before the end and imagine the real ending for yourself.

Day 1 - Ten random facts about yourself
Day 2 - Nine things you do every day
Day 3 - Eight things that annoy you
Day 4 - Seven fears/phobias
Day 5 - Six songs that you’re addicted to
Day 6 - Five things you can’t live without
Day 7 - Four memories you won’t forget
Day 8 - Three words you can’t go a day without
Day 9 - Two things you wish you could do

Day 10 - One person you can trust

Myself. Without that, what is there?

I'm a little torn about Prometheus putting paid to the AVP franchise. On the one hand, some things need to be put a stop to. On the other...awww... Predaliens are so cuuuute. And I'm the kind of geek who enjoys getting a chance to say kainde amedha.

For quite a while now I've been looking for the book that belongs to the title Echidna's Children. Now I know what kind of story it wants to be. Next step: growing the chops to write it.

So, I could attempt to write a somewhat thoughtful and complex response to Prometheus. Or I could write Michael Fassbender's name a hundred times surrounded by glittery hearts.



When I'm done with that, and my hand stops cramping, I may try the thoughtful approach again.

My day has been markedly unproductive, as the boy came home from work early and put in Mass Effect 3. This game is so awesome, you guys. This game is fan-fucking-tastic. This pretty much makes up for Dragon Age 2 and the boringness of ME2. Not having to deal with the Cigarette Smoking Illusive Man and the bigoted assclows of Cerberus is a huge help. Not to mention you get the band back together. I've teared up three times in one day watching this game--once for a death-or-glory stand that ended in glory, one that ended in death, and once in sheer unmitigated nerdjoy when you summon the [SPOILER] to deal with the [SPOILER].

So far everything in this game makes up for all the things I didn't like about the last two: namely how you were forced to deal with xenophobic douche canoes without being able to turn them into a fine red mist (or court-martial them). And somehow rescuing a damsel in distress bothers me less when the damsel is a giant psychic space insect who looks like the lovechild of Shelob and the Xenomorph queen.

Also, there seems to be even more queer content, most of it gracefully integrated. Except Kaidan--he's a douche no matter which gender he's hitting on. It's a pity Garrus appears to be straight. He might be ME's little black dress.

It is, however, a little weird how your subordinate officers keep hitting on you.

Agora, while gorgeous, was so depressing I had to watch Unforgiven as a unicorn chaser.

Predators is the most adorable movie ever. But, the ending is all wrong. We know how this really ended.

In the real version, Royce and Isabelle have a Pitch Black "I said I'd die for them, not you" moment. Then Retro Yautja kicks Kegger Yautja's ass and says to Isabelle, "Hey, hot human chick. Want to take a ride in my spaceship and hunt xenomorphs?" And they live happily ever after, the end.

You know it's true.

Which means that has to be the end of Salvage.

Two out of two hot chicks agree: Sam Worthington has a strong heart.

I think Avatar is gorgeous*. I don't actually know for sure because 3D is the most ridiculous fucked up thing I've ever seen, and I had to watch the whole movie out of focus.

What I do know is that it's insultingly hamfisted. I won't call the Na'vi noble savages, because they're better than that--they're a harmonious indigenous people with a rich culture. Which is just as bad a cliche these days. And for fuck's sake, stop basing alien cultures on non-European earth cultures. WE SEE WHAT YOU DO THERE! Everyone was straight out of central casting, humans and Na'vi, and the bad guys were so flat I could hardly muster any contempt for them. When you find yourself playing a caricature of Paul Reiser, you should stop and reevaluate your life. And the music, jeeze. Just play "Colors of the Wind" over the end credits and have done.

Mind you, in spite of all of this--no, let's face it, because of this--it was effective. I probably would have cried if my eyes hadn't been busy trying to put things in focus. I like Sam Worthington and Sigourney Weaver in just about anything, and I'm sure thousands of people will feel deeply for the plight of the harmonious aliens.

I, however, do not need my hand held to root for the non-humans. That is my default state. Candycoating it just pisses me off. Screw skin color--I'm sick of human saviors.

Despite that, I will be over here watching Aliens, because I need a xenomorph chaser something fierce.



(...okay, maybe Lance Henriksen and Jenette Goldstein make me warm to humanity just a little. At least for a couple of hours at a time.)

*Did anyone else get a Michael Whelan vibe from the set design?