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Nov. 24th, 2007
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I am trying to watch Bloodrayne, at long last.
Oh my god. This movie is so bad. I mean, I knew. It's Boll--of course it's bad. But this is so much worse than I ever imagined.
Many movies are bad. Many movies are bad in different ways. This movie is bad in every way. Everyone involved in this movie--actors, writers, costumers, camera-men, gaffers--everyone is making the very worst possible decision at every moment. There is no respite from the awfulness.
Billy Zane appears to be completely blitzed, and I suspect Michael Madsen is drunk as well and just maintaining better. Michelle Rodriguez is pissed off, Ben Kingsley is petrified, Udo Kier is on auto pilot, and Kristanna Loken is very confused. The guy with the mullet I think is just too incompetent to know what's going on around him. The extras look glazed. Meat Loaf is drugged out of his mind. I'm guessing Boll was pointing a gun at them the whole time--there's no other adequate explanation.
And I'm only half an hour in.
Is even Showgirls worse than this?
Oh my god. This movie is so bad. I mean, I knew. It's Boll--of course it's bad. But this is so much worse than I ever imagined.
Many movies are bad. Many movies are bad in different ways. This movie is bad in every way. Everyone involved in this movie--actors, writers, costumers, camera-men, gaffers--everyone is making the very worst possible decision at every moment. There is no respite from the awfulness.
Billy Zane appears to be completely blitzed, and I suspect Michael Madsen is drunk as well and just maintaining better. Michelle Rodriguez is pissed off, Ben Kingsley is petrified, Udo Kier is on auto pilot, and Kristanna Loken is very confused. The guy with the mullet I think is just too incompetent to know what's going on around him. The extras look glazed. Meat Loaf is drugged out of his mind. I'm guessing Boll was pointing a gun at them the whole time--there's no other adequate explanation.
And I'm only half an hour in.
Is even Showgirls worse than this?
