Hwaet!

This... Is... DENMARK!

Good:
Ray Winstone's Beowulf
Brendan Gleeson's Wiglaf
Crispin Glover's Old English
circular narrative and thematic arcs
John Malkovich in anything

Bad:
bloody motion capture
bloody motion capture hair
Angelina Jolie's motion capture especially
Viking brazilian waxes
Pervasive Christianity in Denmark in the 6th century. Harald Bluetooth, people.

Hilarious:
Porn!Beowulf
Stripper!Beowulf, terror of Frisians, monsters, and everyone else
Viking brazilian waxes

Well... It's funny as hell. It's the best of the Beowulf movies. (Not counting The 13th Warrior.) It's really funny... The novelization is better than the movie. Yes, I just typed those words. I still have yet to be really happy with a depiction of Grendel. Guess I'm going to have to write my own. I would, however, pay Crispin Glover to walk around being creepy and speaking Old English all the time.

(no subject)

If You Were in Beowulf... created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as The Dragon Ancient, chaotic, and a bit mysterious is the Dragon figure. Awakened from your happy slumber upon a pile of gold, you go about the country slaying its occupants. Beowulf manages to kill you, but not before you ensure his death. Congrats. The Dragon 75% Grendel 75% Grendel's Mother 58% Wiglaf 58% Beowulf 33% Hrothgar 33% Wealhtheow 0%